Taffy the Laffy Samoyed Stories

page 15

52. Taff & the happy zappie

Well this morning Taff was rompin and rearing to go walk with the campground Lab off leash, I should have suspected he was too fired up to mind well, like he ever does anyhow hahaha.

Off him and Lab race down the road, well actually Taff races, the Lab trots, Taff runs back and forth about 72 times covering 2 miles for every hundred feet forward of the Lab.

Now this morning the campground Lab's mom brought her shock collar to show me how easy it is train Taff to come back when called.

OKIE DOKIE!

We put the shock collar on Taff and called him , he came right to us, so we made a big fuss over him. We walked on and Taff started trotting, we called but he ignored us, the Lab's mom gave him a zap, nothing, Taff kept trotting, I could hear panic growing in her voice as she dialed up the zapper to higher numbers while frantically calling Taff with a louder and louder voice as Taff's plumy tail disappeared down the road.

Pretty soon she was pointing the zapper like a TV remote and practically screaming, I could see Taff shake his head a couple times and open up more space between us.

Obviously it is best to use these while your dog is on a long lead so he gets the idea the shock means come back and when he don't you drag him back, obviously we blew that, obviously Taff figured out the exact range of the zapper and stayed just out of range, and obviously as long as he was THAT far away he may as well take a road trip of his own.

Now I know exactly when Taff is going to bolt, first off he stands up real straight with his tail real high, then the ears go up and almost touch, he goes from a walk-to a speed walk-to a trot-to a slow run-to belly down burn up the pavement running. The faster his body moves the more forward his ears lean until he whips them down flat like stealth bomber wings, lowers his whole body and... good night Irene he is OFF...!!!!

 NOT ONCE will he turn his head back to you no matter what sound you make.

Taff hit the end of the paved road, made a 45 degree turn and bolted up the hillside into the thick wilderness!

Now the campground Lab's mom is half hysterical, I said "hey if he don't know every inch of this town by now he never will" and headed back home walking the Lab and calling Taff, my plan was to go get the car.

Charlie asked where Taff was and we told him he took off, he fired up the locomotive, built up air and then blasted the air horn three times, which Taff KNOWS means the train is leaving town.

Suddenly the Lab's mom let out a shout, 1/2 a mile away Taff bounded out of the woods and tore up the pavement running towards us and the locomotive engine. I waved his leash over my head and shouted "Come on Taff, let's go baby, come on Pumpkin, (Charlie blew the whistle again) Taff picked up the pace, I was standing in the center of the road cheering Taff on and calling endearments, he was huffing like a steam engine but coming on. When he got to within a couple hundred feet we could see he was covered in black slime up to his belly, the Lab's mom almost had a heart attack, it was oozing out from between his toes hahaha.

Finally he arrived at us and plopped down on the ground, the Lab gave him a corrective growl and nip, Taff dodged away. I snapped on his leash and told him OK let's walk, he gave me an exhausted look and tried to turn up the driveway.....no way... we're WALKIN bubba!

We took off the zapper collar and Taff fought us, I explained to the Lab's mom that in Taff's mind the zapper was a "repel" device, every time we shocked him  he realized if he kept of out range we couldn't annoy him, it gave him a license to get farther and farther away, which we would never tolerate with him just off leash, he wanted an excuse to run and we gave it to him. Taff LIKED the zapper collar, we gave him an escape tool....DA!

 I have no idea how they work but up to the setting of 6 all he did was put his ears sideways like he was hearing a bumble bee and above that he just tossed his head like he had something in his ear.

What a little turd!

All the way down to the river he huffed and puffed and you could tell he was finally winded after walking 4 miles and running 2 more through the thick woods, cause I know EXACTLY where he was, way up past the end of the road up in the woods is a huge old swamp, I know cause one of the neighbors dogs got in there once and came home smelling like a road kill.

Down at the river for a bath, Taff hit the water like a Killer Wale and drank enough of it that the river level dropped. It took a while for him to wash off all the  stinky-goo but we let him splash around figuring we'd pull him out if we saw any fish go belly up, it was pretty nasty. haha.

He came home and then dove in and splashed half the clean water out of his play tub and now is eating.

He appears to have recovered fully from his shocking training experience, the Lab's mom is now laying down under sedation with a cold compress on her head. I hope she recovers, I don't think she is Taff owner material, she faints to easy hahaha.

We'll cross that training tool  off the list, but maybe I should carry around a tape recording of the locomotive air horn whooo hooo hahaha. mfb

53. Taff & the mark up

We'll  I have been watching a very senior Lab while his family is on vacation, he is a tad feeble but a sweet old guy.

Since the Lab is on a feeding schedule with medication, unlike Taff who free feeds, I have been going over every morning and evening to feed and water him.

I figured maybe I could walk the Lab before feeding him just to help his circulation a little but we don't go far, compared to Taff's marathon jaunts.

I decided to walk the Lab up here to our house and back, which is just a nice outing for him and he seems to enjoy puttering along and sniffing around.

Then I tie the Lab out in his yard on his cable for a spell and take Taff on a longer jaunt.

The Lab is a whole lot easier to walk than Taff and don't seem to care in the least where we go at a slow shuffle, unlike Taff who has to explore the entire town from one end to the other at about 20 mph, if you can keep up, or he pouts.

It has been interesting to say the least,  Taff feels the entire town was actually built as a huge playground for him and then stocked with people to feed him treats and fuss over him. He can't figure out why I am suddenly leaving him all alone and walking the Lab.

The Lab couldn't figure out who this strange woman was who came over and drug him out of his kennel in the middle of a good nap, however he is now awake and eager to go when I arrive.

Taff is also surrounded by people night and day at his beck and call as we have a pretty large crew and work on site, the Lab's small family works and goes to school far away, so they can only spend time with him in the evening and on weekends.

Well this has been going on for a few days, and now Taff and the Lab have decided to have a marking contest, in all fairness Taff started it.

I was going to walk them together but the Lab did not like that idea, so when I put the Lab back in his kennel, Taff raced up and marked the corner big time, looked like a fire hose going off, the Lab was none to happy and huff/coughed at Taff, he sounded like an 80 year old chain smoker.

The next day I walked the Lab up here and that is when he suddenly decided to leave a huge pile right beside the outside corner of Taff's play pen, looked like a circus elephant had stopped by, Taff watched in horror from inside his fence and was none to happy, he responded by leaping up in the air like a Killer Whale and howling his head off loud enough to call a wolf pack off the tundra hahaha.

We are now in a marking war, Taff of course who drinks 18 gallons of water a day and can lift his leg almost over his head, is way ahead in the fire hydrant department, however the Lab is a much bigger eater of dry dog food than Taff and can leave a solid pile as large as a bear.

Taff also can shake off about 5 lbs of long, bright white fur to leave behind as a token of his visit, the Lab is actually bald in spots, cammo-brown and short haired, no contest there.

So between hosing off the corner of the Lab's kennel and shoveling up the outside corner of Taff's play pen it has turned into quite a work out for me, besides all the walking hahaha.

On the up side, both boys are real regular, both pens are real clean, and I believe the Lab is having the time of his entire life, even though his yard looks like a snow storm hit it (even though it is August),Taff on the other hand is now suddenly gorging himself on dry dog food, cardboard, great big leaves and quilt stuffing, I SUSPECT an escalation of  his evacuations!

If it keeps up I may have to call in the fire department with a tanker truck and a land fill company with a big earth mover, so the soil can recover!

There goes Taff's treat fund- oh oh!

Check back for more crap hahaha mfb.

53. Taff & the Big Squeaky

Well I have tried every dog whistle, game caller, clicker and what not
to get Taff's attention over time, especially outside when we are
walking and he is in "hunt mode" which is 99% of the time.
I have called more game out of the woods and more predator birds
overhead than you even want to know about.
So this afternoon it starts snowing like a bandit, it is a white out,
temperature is dropping like a stone.
I decide we better beat feet if we are going to walk today cause the
snow is already getting crunchy out there, which means it is getting
colder.
The wind kicks up and I can't see 10 feet down the road but Taff is at
the end of his 40 foot lead somewhere ahead.
A white fluff in a white swirl!
So I am walking, actually trudging, bent over ahead about 45 degrees
into the wind which is doing about 35 mph blowing me back. So pretty
much I was walking straight up hahaha.
Taff decided to stop and sniff something, imagine that, and I took the
slack action time to button the top button on my coat and my shirt
underneath which was under a sweater, it was then that I realized that
in my pocket, snatched from the jaws of Taff was a big 2 inch around
squeaker out of one of his toys.
Just for idle curiosity I poked my gloved finger into the squeaker,
buried under all those clothes.
All of a sudden Taff's lead went slack and out of the blinding white
swirl came a huge white body dead at me and airborne, it flung it's
paws up on my shoulders and almost bowled me over.
It was Taff, he was jumpin around on his back legs like a Kangaroo.
So I poked the squeaker again and he went ballistic, came right up and
jumped on me again, OK this is fun!
Off we went into the mini-blizzard and every couple hundred feet I
would poke that squeaker and Taff would whirl around and bound back to
me without me saying a SINGLE word!!!!!!
Well I figured the cold was making me hallucinate, Taff would not come
for a fresh road kill hanging from my belt, even if I did call him.
So down the road we go and I shorten his lead so I can see him, I wait
till he is hot on the trail of some mythical in his mind big game, you
know the signals, tense body, neck arched, ears almost touching, tongue
just sticking through the lips, maybe one paw raised like a bird dog,
seconds from pouncing...just before he went airborne for a pounce I hit
that squeaker in my shirt pocket, now here is Taff in almost kill mode
and what does he do????
He swings his head around to me, looks back at the hole in the ground,
whines and then runs straight to me. HOLY COW!!!!!
I am telling you I was like Fred Sanford on the old TV show, I got one
hand over my heart and I am staggering around in circles yelling to the
white sky, "That's it Lizbeth I'm comin to join ya!"
Not a soul in the world is out here but me to see this Sammie miracle!
Taff cocks his head sideways and runs back to the rabbit hole.
Now right here is where I figure that whatever is making this work
could dry up in the blink of an eye, so I decided to save a little
squeaking in the bank till we got out to the railroad bridge which is a
mile in the other direction.
I swing Taff around and start heading back, with the wind at my back I
could make better time, I looked like an advertisement for spray snow
but I kept trudging on.
I practically drag Taff across the intersection, he is getting worried
as I usually hold him on a 2 foot lead but I can't wait to get to the
big game trails.
Out by the bridge is where the herds of deer and hordes of rabbits
cross straight across the railroad tracks and the place is covered in
a zillion animal tracks.
I play out Taff's long lead and just wait for him to catch a scent, we
don't get 5 feet and BINGO big old hoof prints in the snow, Taff goes
nose down, he gets to the end of his lead and splays them big paws
out, he is hunkered down to pull like an ox, that is when I whip that
squeaker clear out of my pocket and let go with a big squeak!
Weeeeekie weeeeeekie!
Ol Taff comes clear up off the ground and does a u-turn in mid air!
Whooo hooo, I got him now...he heads right back to me like an arrow to
a bull's-eye, I spread my feet and swing my arms wide just waiting for
him to hit my chest like a charging grizzly!
There I stand like a Tundra version of a scarecrow covered in about
half a foot of snow from head to toe, here comes Taff, I got the
biggest smile on my face you ever saw, whoo hoo here comes MY BOY!
He went by me like Amtrak in the North East Corridor, just about pulled
my arm out of the socket as he hit the open stretch behind me hot on
the trail of a HUGE rabbit who obviously had come running out of the
brush when I hit that stupid squeaky.
I will tell you what, he spun me around so fast I drilled myself about
6 inches into the ground and my whole life flashed before my eyes, but
that is when I remembered I had the squeaky, I let go about three hard
blasts WEEEEEKIE WEEEKIE WEEEEKIE!!!
Low and behold the rabbit doubled back!
That is when I grabbed Taff's lead and started reeling it in hand over
hand, by the time he got back by me I was hunkered down and ready to
grab him.
He was not a happy puppy when I threw myself over him like a blanket as
he went by.
The rabbit disappeared in the brush, I stood up and now covered in 2
feet of snow from head to toe me and Taff walked on back in the fading
light and white powder.
He was bounding along like life don't get any better than this!
I think we will have to rethink the squeaker as a recall tool, at least
out by the bridge:) hahaha
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